Weekend Spread: Week 9

Week 8 Standings

Bobby: 3-4 (38-25) [96-78]

Ty: 2-5 (29-34) [35-37]

Boatin’ Blake: 6-1 (41-22) [100-74]

Congrats to the silent, yet deadly, Boatin’ Blake on hitting the Century Club after a BIG Week 8. With three big ranked matchups this week, the college football season is starting to turn down the final stretch. Can anyone top The Captain?

#13 Wisconsin @ #3 Ohio State (tOSU -14) BIG NUDE SATURDAY, FOX

Bobby: I was very much expecting Wisconsin to completely fall apart this season, as is tradition. However, I figured they would wait until this week to do it, not against garbage ass Illinois.

Ohio State has been a damn wagon all season, covering every spread this season outside of a game one backdoor cover from FAU. Wisconsin simply doesn’t have the athletes to keep up with this Ohio State squad.

The Buckeyes are going to roll over Wisconsin in The Horseshoe. Ohio State, -14

Ty: So maybe we jumped the gun on the whole Wisconsin in the playoffs thing. Maybe we put too much stock in four shutouts. Maybe we overestimated the Michigan (who is ass) win. Maybe Wisconsin is doing what they do every year, just building hype for the collapse. But…

Maybe Ohio State is doing the same. Maybe Ohio State is ripe for upset, stranger things have happened. Maybe Ohio State is coasting without Urban, and will crumble at the first real sign of competition. Maybe Ohio State isn’t the top of the B1G.

LMAOOOOOO jk Ohio State is going to run Wisconsin off the field with no effort. Ohio State, -14

Boatin’ Blake: Ohio State, -14

#9 Auburn @ #2 LSU (LSU -12) CBS, 2:30 CT

Bobby: This line was wildly low to start the week and it’s steadily dropped to about -10.5, which is wild. Auburn and Bo Nix have revealed themselves to be trash and Death Valley is going to be bumping.

Auburn will keep this game close enough to sweat through this, but that LSU offense will pull through for the cover. LSU, -12

Ty: LET. THE. BAND. PLAY. NECK.

LSU, -12

Boatin’ Blake: LSU, -12

#8 Notre Dame @ #19 Michigan (MICH. -1.5) ABC, 6:30 CT

Bobby: Look, Michigan is not a very good team. However, as this Wolverine squad showed us last week in a gritty road cover, they refuse to give up. I’m not big on Notre Dame this year, who nearly dropped a home game to USC.

The Big House rarely gets night games, but when they do, things tend to go well for Michigan. I think they pull this one out. Michigan, -1.5

Ty: You hate to see it, but Notre Dame wins here. Honestly, I’d be happy if both teams could lose, because they both suck. ND and Michigan for some reason believe that they are bluebloods even though neither of them have won a conference title in decades.

Wow, do I hate both of these teams. I hate ND, for thinking that they deserve a seat at the table, and I hate Michigan because it’s fun to hate on people while they are down. Michigan is such a dumpster fire and they are held together with wins against Rutgers and other bottom feeders.

Again, jot this one down as another nail in the coffin for Jim Harbaugh’s career at Michigan. I hate to say it but Go Irish. Notre Dame, +1.5

Boatin’ Blake: Michigan, -1.5

Texas Tech @ Kansas (TECH -3.5) FS1, 6:00 PM CT

Bobby: With Kansas nearly knocking off Texas last week (I mourn for the memes that could have been), it seems everyone is on board with the ‘Hawks breaking through for another win. However, the team people should be high on is actually the Red Raiders.

Texas Tech has scrapped and fought ever since they got blown off the field in Norman several weeks ago. Jett Duffey has transformed into a quarterback who has positioned the Red Raiders as a team nobody wants to face.

I get the KU hype here, but I just think Tech is a better team right now than people are giving them credit for. Texas Tech, -3.5

Ty: KANSAS WILL WIN FOUR GAMES THIS SEASON. I am digging in here, and going down with the ship. KANSAS WILL WIN.

Good morning Kansas betters.

In less than a day, Jayhawks from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest football game in the history of Kansas.

“Kansas.”

That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can’t be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common desire for a KU win.

Perhaps it’s fate that today is October 26th, and you will once again be fighting for literally any win… Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution… but from going 2-10.

We are fighting for our right to win four games. To exist. And should we win the day, October (Brocktober) will no longer be known as an Iowa State holiday, but as the day Kansas Football declared in one voice:

We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight!  We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! Today we celebrate our third win of the season!” Kansas, STRAIGHT UP

Boatin’ Blake: Kansas, +3.5

Oklahoma State @ #23 Iowa State (ISU -10.5) FS1, 2:30 PM

Bobby: BROCKTOBER CONTINUES TO ROLL. Don’t listen to the doubters, this is 100% a real thing. The Cyclones, mocked in preseason, counted out after losing to Iowa and Baylor, are looking like a legitimate football team.

While I feel uncomfortable with the line being as high as it is, I gotta trust the process here as I have yet to lose a game when picking the Cyclones. Iowa State, -10.5

Ty: Brocktober isn’t real. But OSU is hella ass. Iowa State, -10.5

Boatin’ Blake: Iowa State, -10.5

#15 Texas @ TCU (UT -1.5) FOX, 2:30 CT

Bobby: This line is an absolute gift from God. While I would love to spend this space trashing the Longhorns for almost blowing it at home against Kansas, that would be counter productive.

I understand why people would be skittish about Texas this weekend. TCU is at home for homecoming, debuting new uniforms and entered the season with preseason hype while Texas…almost lost to Kansas last week.

However, it should be noted that TCU has been a mess this season. Their two FBS wins are against Purdue and Kansas. This is not a good football team by any measure. Texas should handle this team comfortably. Lock of the Century. Texas, -1.5

(Worst case scenario, we are all wrong and this is hilarious)

Ty: TCU’s dumb ass “cool” uniforms will look great in the Texas highlight videos. The Frogs are going to look terrible out there, especially against this joke of a Texas team.

I still believe that a strong Texas is the best possible thing for OU, as they actually get national respect. Baylor can do whatever they want, nobody respects them. Hell, the whole reason that we have a Big 12 Championship game is because Baylor and TCU get no national respect.

OUThe Sooners need UT to win out and every game matters (obviously not the title game tho). This pick is entirely personal.

Wait, HOLD UP lmao this is the -1.5 line game! Hell yes! Slap as many bands as you can on this line! WOOOOOO boy here we go. This is a money game right here. Texas, -1.5

Boatin’ Blake: Texas, -1.5

#5 Oklahoma @ Kansas State (OU -21) ABC, 11:00 AM

Bobby: When Kansas State beat Mississippi State in September, this game immediately rocketed up to the game I was most shook by. Manhattan can be a viper pit and K-State looked like the third best team in the Big 12.

Yeah, that was an overreaction.

The Wildcats have a porous defense prone to busting on big plays and a one-dimensional offense. While there has been some upset talk surrounding this game, I think it’s all fluff. This line is only close due to that one SEC road game.

OU has proven that they are not only a Playoff caliber team, but a focused team. I think the Sooners roll big here. Oklahoma, -21

Ty: You already know what I’m going to say. Check the pod for a better breakdown. I have been TERRIBLE at picking OU games this year so who knows what will happen. I think OU covers, but idek man. Oklahoma, -21

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma, -21

Weekend Spread: Week 8

Week 7 Standings

Bobby: 4-2 (35-21) [93-74]

Ty: 4-2 (27-29) [33-32]

Boatin’ Blake: 3-3 (35-21) [94-73]

After a couple tough weeks for the Weekend Spread boys (including a missing article last week), the boys are back and ready to right the ship. Let’s Go!

#1 Michigan @ #7 Penn State (PSU -9) 6:30, ABC

Bobby: Look, Penn State might be for real. The offense has been on fire and at every turn they continue to keep pressing onward. Will they collapse the second I pick them? Probably. Still, give me the White Out in Happy Valley against a shaky Michigan squad. Penn State, -9

Ty: This is a must win for Jimbo H. Unfortunately, I don’t think that he will. Mark this one down as another nail in the coffin, you hate to see it (Personally I don’t hate to see it).

Penn State is a better team easily, and playing in Happy Valley is worth at least a TD. Nine points is just too easy, give me the Bobcats, or whatever PSU’s mascot is. I really did forget here so I’m just going to roll with it. Penn State, -9

Boatin’ Blake: Michigan, +9

#12 Oregon @ #25 Washington (ORE -3) ABC, 2:30 CT

Bobby: I got killed on the Midseason Review pod for suggesting that Oregon might still sneak into the Playoff. Do I dare double down and risk getting clowned further?

Hell yeah I do. Oregon is a cut above the Pac-12 this season and is about to run the table. I don’t think they will make the playoff (too many SEC teams), but they will be creeping at #5 or #6 by the end of the year. Oregon, -3

Ty: Call it The Soy Bowl, The Battle of the Hipsters, The Starbucks Shootout, The Granola Game, The Football Game of Nerds and Lames, The Ducks vs the Huskies, the alternate uniforms vs the knock off K-States, who cares. It’s just a Pac-12 game. Anyways, that list went on for way too long, I should have stopped at Granola Game.

I think that the Ducks win this one. Also I want it in writing that Bobby did say that Oregon could make the playoffs. NEVER FORGET that shit take. Oregon, -3

Boatin’ Blake: Washington, +3

Kansas State @ TCU (TCU -3.5) 1:30 CT

Bobby: Honestly, these teams aren’t that different. Both are purple, had early season hype after impressive (at the time) Power 5 wins, and both collapsed the second they stepped into conference play.

I hate both of these teams, but at least K-State knows who to play at quarterback. Kansas State, +3.5

Ty: Talk about two teams that cannot be accurately predicted. I lean TCU here, especially as their SMU loss looks better and better each week.

*Pause here to acknowledge my SMU ponies who are undefeated so far*(I’ve always been a lifelong SMU fan)

I think that TCU is the move here, honestly. Kansas State rode a big high and hung their hat on a win at Mississippi State, a team that LOST TO TENNESSEE! TCU is the clear pick here, and I bet that it’s an easy cover. TCU, -3.5

Boatin’ Blake: Kansas State, +3.5

Iowa State @ Texas Tech (ISU -7) FS1, 11:00 AM CT

Bobby: BROCKTOBER CONTINUES. With Iowa State’s undefeated October streak well into Season 3, how could you not take the Cyclones? Sure, Texas Tech has soiled two straight covers for me, but I believe in the power of Brocktober. Iowa State, -7

Ty: Oh, how the mighty preseason expectations have fallen. Iowa State, who Bobby thought would play in Dallas this December, has fallen off the deep end. I wouldn’t be surprised if OU shuts out the Cyclones this year. ISU is BIG ass this year, and Matty C. is still a coward.

All of this being said, boy does Tech suck this year. I’m taking those cowards up in Indiana or wherever. Iowa State, -7

P.S. This is not a rivalry.

Boatin’ Blake: Texas Tech, +7

Kansas @ #15 Texas (UT -22) LHN, 6:00 PM

Bobby: The greatest rivalry in the Big 12. As much as I’d love to see Texas completely drop the ball here and not dominate a pretty brutal Kansas team, I think they come out and wipe the floor with the Jayhawks. I’m not a fan of the 22 point spread, but nonetheless. Texas, -22

Ty: Texas has TWO losses and its Week 8 LMAOOOOOO. SMH I can’t relate.

Anyways, UT is looking to bounce back and make a statement here against Kansas. This game is in Austin and Texas will come out hot to stomp the Hawks. There’s always basketball season KU. Cue the weird Tom Herman nipple rub celebration.

Texas, -22

Boatin’ Blake: Kansas, +22

#18 Baylor @ Oklahoma State (OSU -3.5) FOX, 3:00 CT

Bobby: When you pick every Big 12 game for three straight years, you learn a few things about how this weird ass conference works. One of the key features of this conference is the fact that any team that looks to be solid strength of schedule fuel for Oklahoma will promptly lose a stupid game and blow their hopes of being ranked by the time they get to OU.

Cue Oklahoma State. While the Cowboys famously cannot beat OU, they have found the next best thing: ruining everything else.

The Pokes have a knack for beating top ranked competition (West Virginia and Texas) and taking their ranking but then completely pooping the bed against awful teams, thus self tanking their own quality to the point that beating them is significantly less impressive.

Meanwhile, Baylor has been actively trying to collapse this entire season, but the universe simply will not allow them to die. This undefeated record is built on a blown 20 point lead at home and an egregious no call in a double overtime.

Vegas appears to have caught on to both the Poke system and Baylor’s Jenga Tower record and rightfully have Oklahoma State favored in this game. The Cowboys have come to take their toll and they shall receive it. Oklahoma State, -3.5

Ty: Baylor is ass bruh, Chubba finna eat. Oklahoma State, -3.5

Boatin’ Blake: Baylor, +3.5

West Virginia @ #5 Oklahoma (OU -33.5) BIG NUDE SATURDAY ON FOX

Bobby: West Virginia isn’t good. At all.

However, 33.5 is just SO MUCH points. Personally, I think OU can cover this thing, but relying on any team to lock down a team in garbage time is just not a great strategy. Safe money is on West Virginia, safer money is on avoiding this game altogether. West Virginia, +33.5

Ty: Tune into The Schooner Pod for a more detailed take on this game. OU will win big, but I don’t see OU running it up beyond 28. The Sooners have been less than ideal against the spread this year, and it is because the lines are absurd. I’ll be taking the Country Roads to the bank. Burn your couches. West Virginia, +33.5

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma, -33.5

Weekend Spread: Week 6

Week 5 Standings

Bobby: 5-2 (28-14) [86-67]

Ty: 4-3 (20-22) [26-25]

Boatin’ Blake: 7-0 (30-12) [89-64]

Last Week

It was a BIG Week 5 for the Weekend Spread boys with all three pickers going over .500 for the first time this year. The week was highlighted by Boatin’ Blake going an astounding 7-0, building upon his lead even more. Will the boys stay hot into Week 6?

#14 Iowa @ #19 Michigan (UM -5) BIG NUDE SATURDAY ON FOX

Bobby: Yeah, I know Michigan looked like absolute garbage against Wisconsin. However, I am a firm believer in fearing the fight of a wounded dog. I think Michigan bounces back in a true must win game. Michigan, -5

Ty: Harbaugh is hanging on like Mufasa on the ledge, and PSU, tOSU, and ND are Scar waiting to push him off, back to the stampede that is the bum ass NFL. That analogy sucked, basically Michigan is going to lose a lot more this season, but this one isn’t one of those. Iowa barely beat Iowa State (who Bobby said would be the second best Big 12 team lololololololol), and I’m personally burned out on corn teams. Michigan is at least a TD better than Iowa, especially at home. Michigan, -5

Boatin’ Blake: Iowa, +5

#25 Michigan State @ #4 Ohio State (tOSU -19.5) ABC, 6:30 CT

Bobby: Look, I get that these 19.5 points seem daunting. However, there are two things you need to know here:

1. Ohio State is the real deal

2. Michigan State is big time ass

Buckeyes win big. Ohio State, -19.5

Ty: This game is going to be biblical. tOSU is legit this year, they believe it but they haven’t had a chance to prove it yet. That chance starts here, the Bucks are going to spank, spank I say, the little green Michigan men. Its going to be a good weekend to be a buckeye, and an even better week to bet on tOSU.

Boatin’ Blake: Michigan State, +19.5

#7 Auburn @ #10 Florida (AUB -3.5) CBS, 2:30 CT

Bobby: Personally, I think both of these teams are pretenders waiting to get exposed by the Alabamas and Georgias of the world. This makes this game particularly hard to pick because I’m not sure which one is pretending harder.

However, I do know this: Auburn has come through for me this season while Florida has consistently failed me. Give me the Tigers in The Swamp. Auburn, -3.5

Ty: LAYUP! For real shout out to auburn alum Charles Barkley who at one point probably scored a layup. Anyways Florida is wayyy overhyped and should not be a top 10 team at all. Auburn has one of the most impressive resumes so far, and they are going to expand it here.

I cant believe that this line is only 3 after Auburn’s beating last week. Take a sizable position in this game, I know that I will. The Tigers are a go to layup, and great ingredient to a delicious parlay. Auburn, -3.5

Boatin’ Blake: Florida, +3.5

TCU @ Iowa State (ISU -3.5) ESPN 2, 11:00 AM CT

Bobby: I usually try my best not to flip picks between The Schooner Pod and now, but I came to remember an important bit of knowledge for this game: we are officially in Brocktober.

The past two seasons, Iowa State has gone undefeated in October. To add to the superstition that Iowa State will pull this off, they are also wearing the above uniforms, which are absolute fire.🔥

I’d be a fool to stick with TCU. Iowa State, -3.5

Ty: Who knows with TCU at this point. I hate ISU (see above reference to the ill fated “corn parlay”) I also kinda hate TCU, since they burst OU’s bubble back in 14. I was going to spend this entire segment shit talking Blake, but that wouldn’t make sense because Blake goes to Baylor and is not affiliated with either team. Ill just say ISU because I have to, but both of these teams are on my blackball list, and I recommend that everyone else follow suit. Iowa State, -3.5

Boatin’ Blake: TCU, +3.5

#11 Texas @ West Virginia (UT -11.5) ABC, 2:30 PM

Bobby: This is a juicy porkchop of a line for those who have been paying attention to the Big 12 (aka the writers of this column and loyal fans of The Schooner). While West Virginia is 3-1, that is a number that looks better than it is due to the Flying WV on the helmet.

The Mountaineers are not very good this season. Sure, Texas is 1-8 against the spread before Red River, but they’ll want to shut these folks down after last year’s game and subsequent Horns Down controversy. This was an easy pick at -11.5, and it’s even better now that the line has dropped. Texas, -11.5

Ty: This line is a joke, UT will be conservative as knowing Herman they have already began preparing for OU. WVU is a shell of its former self, and should probably be divested to the ACC. The only real equality in this game is the fact that UT and WVU are academic equals. UT covers easy here. Texas, -11.5

Boatin’ Blake: Texas, -11.5

Baylor @ Kansas State (KSU -2) ESPN 2, 2:30 CT

Bobby: This is a major separation game in the Big 12. While K-State ran into the bright orange buzzsaw in Stillwater, Baylor barely hang on last week in Waco for a win against a non-Brocktober Iowa State team. So basically a wash.

This one truly could go either way, but I like the Wildcats to right the ship at home against Baylor. Kansas State, -2

Ty: Baylor is ass bruh. Kansas State, -2

Boatin’ Blake: Baylor, +2

#21 Oklahoma State @ Texas Tech (OSU -9) FS1, 11 AM

Bobby: This line is absolutely laughable. Apparently people in Vegas don’t get information on game times, because this one will have the atmosphere of a morgue. The tailgates will have better attendance than the actual game will. Plus, the Red Raiders are awful, as we saw Saturday. Chubba Hubbard will have a field day. Oklahoma State, -9

Ty: TTU, wow their hype popped faster than Alan Bowman’s paper lungs. OSU showed everyone that they are still the same old OSU during their trip to Austin. Gundy will easily take his team to the dub, and a 9 point cover is a lock. Oklahoma State, -9

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma State, -9

#6 Oklahoma @ Kansas (OU -35) ABC, 11:00 AM

Bobby: Last season, Kansas and Pooka Williams Jr. embarrassed the hell out of the Oklahoma defense, running for 252 yards on Owen Field.

If you don’t think Alex Grinch has been drilling that game tape into the defensive unit’s head all week, you just haven’t been paying attention. The Sooners will be out for blood against this Kansas team that frankly isn’t ready for the defensive onslaught that is about to occur.

Hot take: Speed D keeps Kansas out of the endzone all game. Oklahoma, -35

Ty: Come on, really? Oklahoma, -35

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma, -35

Weekend Spread: Week 5

Week 4 Standings

Bobby: 3-3 (23-12) [81-65]

Ty: 3-3 (16-119) [22-22]

Boatin’ Blake: 3-3 (23-12) [82-64]

Last Week

Week 4 was a wash for all parties involved. Everyone finished 3-3 (pushes count as wins, don’t ask why) and had a few excruciating personal losses. In Week 5, can the Weekend Spread crew recover?

#18 Virginia @ #10 Notre Dame (ND -11) NBC, 2:30 CT

Bobby: I don’t trust this UVA team one single bit. The past two weeks, the supposed 2nd best ACC team has struggled against lowly Florida State and Old Dominion. Notre Dame on the other hand, looked solid in a tight game against Georgia between the hedges last week. This one feels easy, but don’t be shocked if the Hoos find a way to soil this. Notre Dame, -11

Ty: UVA is coming off a win here, and Notre Dame is coming off of a loss. Both teams are coming into this week disappointed in their performance last week. Many betters, myself included, are also very disappointed in their performance last week.

Virginia is a disappointing team this year and the Irish are the most overhyped team since that team from “Rudy”. ND is the safer bet here though. Notre Dame, -11

Boatin’ Blake: Notre Dame, -11

#21 USC @ #17 Washington (UW -3) FOX, 2:30 CT

Bobby: Once again, the Pac-12 is an utter disaster. With USC’s upset over Utah last Friday, the slim Playoff hopes of the conference lie in the hands of the Cal Golden Bears, something I never thought I would say.

The Trojans looked sharp last Friday, despite playing their backup quarterback, but how will they play without that weird Friday night home game boost?

According to OU graduate/USC fan Ford Branan, the move is Washington after the injury bug hit the Trojans secondary this week. Can’t argue with that. Washington, -3

Ty: USC, what a team. The Trojans looked great last week against Utah, who should be unranked, but this isn’t Utah. Washington is a fairly legitimate team this year, and I personally refer to them as “Kansas State, but in purple”.

USC on the other hand, is a physical manifestation of SoCal. It gets a lot of hype, and it is fun at times but overwhelmingly disappointing.  Washington is the safe bet here. Washington, -3

Boatin’ Blake: Washington, -3

#5 Ohio State @ Nebraska (tOSU -17) ABC, 6:30 CT

Bobby: This is a primetime game purely for the TV demographics. Nebraska was unfairly overhyped this season and has understandably let their fans down as rebounding from 4-8 into a Big Ten contender is a nearly impossible task.

The Huskers have improved this season, but this Ohio State team is a buzzsaw. While the Buckeyes haven’t played anyone good this season yet, their offensive production would be impressive against tackling dummies. This will be a bloodbath. Ohio State, -17

Ty: Ahh yes B1G vs. Big12 North. Wait, This game got Gameday? How?

Anyways, Nebraska is basically turning into the A&M of Nebraska (I was going to say the A&M of the North/B1G, but that’s already Michigan). tOSU is impressing everyone so far, as they haven’t skipped a beat since losing Urban. 

The Buckeyes will put up points, and it will be a footnote in the downfall of Scott Frost who will probably pull a Kingsbury and fail upwards. Ohio State, -17

Boatin’ Blake: Ohio State, -17

Kansas @ TCU (TCU -15.5) FS1, 11:00 AM CT

Bobby: GIMME THE ‘HAWKS! Look, TCU will probably rebound and get a win here, but a cover? No way. Kansas always seems to keep it close against TCU and even won last season. They will have no fear going into Amon G. Carter on Saturday. The Frogs will win this, but I think the Mad Hatter keeps this game within reach long enough to make TCU fans sweat through their PFGs. Kansas, +15.5

Ty: YOU ALREADY F****** KNOW, KU BY 14 BABY! Kansas is already halfway to their four or more wins. Kansas will probably be bowl eligible honestly.  Throw EVERYTHING on KU. Kansas, +15.5

Boatin’ Blake: TCU, -15.5

Iowa State @ Baylor (ISU -3) ESPN, 2:30 PM

Bobby: This is a massive game for determining who will sit atop the mediocre glut of teams in the Big 12. Iowa State has had a tough few weeks, narrowly avoiding an embarrassing UNI upset in Week 1 and losing to the hated Hawkeyes after a disastrous friendly fire play.

Baylor has spent their season to this point rolling through directional Texas schools like it was 2014, just with less…issues. They are the epitome of an untested team and I have no read on them.

I think these teams are pretty even, so give me the home dog that hasn’t embarrassed themselves yet. Baylor, +3

Ty: In the words of me, “Baylor is ass”. Iowa State, -3

Boatin’ Blake: Baylor, +3

#24 Kansas State @ Oklahoma State (OSU -4) r/CFBStreams ESPN+, 6:30 CT

Bobby: If you want a prime example of why the Big 12 is a disaster, look no further than this game. These are the two teams who are firmly in the second tier of the conference that are within punching distance of the Red River duo; whoever wins has the best shot at breaking into the Big 12 Championship.

Add in the quality of teams, one of the best atmospheres in the conference with a nighttime Boone Pickens Stadium PLUS the fact this the first game played there since Boone passed and you have a made for primetime game. Despite this, the game isn’t even on TV, relegated to ESPN+.

What a disgrace. I know ESPN+ is easy to get, but the disrespect to put this on a streaming service is a joke.

As for the game, I think Chris Kleman’s Wildcats keep this thing going and get another big road win. The Skylar Thompson-Spencer Sanders duel is going to be amazing, but the K-State defense will be the difference maker here. Kansas State, +4

Ty: This will probably be the most interesting game to watch this weekend. Kansas State is getting some hype on both sides of the ball, coasting from the groundwork laid by Bill Snyder who many expect to be a lock for the Michigan job soon.

Oklahoma State is coming off two losses this week. While OSU’s first loss came at Texas, their second L came when that Poke-Gooner tried to say, “we drink cold beer in Stillwater” and someone hit them with “we win championships in Norman”. Jajajaja sick burn, GOTHIM!

K-State is a legitimate team, as evidenced by their win at Mississippi State, as are the Pokes as evidenced by their performance in their loss in Austin. Personally, I’m betting on Gundy being the difference here. Oklahoma State, -4

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma State, -4

Texas Tech @ #6 Oklahoma (OU -27) BIG NUDE SATURDAY ON FOX [11:00 AM]

Bobby: As we inch closer to game day, I feel worse and worse about OU covering this. I know the Sooners will light up the scoreboard, but there is something about that Double T that makes 27 look insurmountable.

However, the Red Raiders are not the offensive juggernaut they once were, scoring just 14 against an awful Arizona team two weeks ago. I think Speed D puts on a show and shuts down this backup led Texas Tech offense, with Jalen and crew handling business as usual. Oklahoma, -27

Ty: As usual catch a great preview on the Schooner Pod/Blog. I thought it over, and I just can’t count on OU to win big here. I’m flipping from my pod prediction and I’m going Tech. The Sooner defense is ass bro. If you don’t believe me, just go look at our secondary’s performance.

The Red Raiders have been scoring a lot this season and OU will have one of the weakest defenses that Tech will face all year.  Texas Tech, +27

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma, -27

Weekend Spread: Week 4

Week 3 Standings

Bobby: 7-2 (20-9) [78-62]

Ty: 4-5 (13-16) [19-19]

Boatin’ Blake: 5-4 (20-9) [79-61]

Last Week

After another big week, Bobby has pulled into a tie for the lead with Blake, following a pair of risky picks with Kansas State and Houston. Ty continues to flounder at the bottom, is looking for a spark as his beloved Jayhawks return to the Weekend Spread.

#8 Auburn @ #17 Texas A&M (A&M -3.5)

Bobby: Now that the cupcake games are over and we are into conference season, it’s time to see who will seperate themselves from the pack. I’m not a big believer in making snap judgements from one good or bad performance and with such a low sample size, there are many games I have no clue on. This game, along with all but one of these, is one of those that I really need a few more weeks to have insight on.

Honestly, I think both of these teams are dramatically overrated. Texas A&M and Kellen Mond looked awful in their trip to Clemson and I wasn’t overly impressed by Bo Nix and crew in Auburn’s season opening win against Oregon.

I think this might be as much of a coin flip as you can get. However, I think Kyle Field will be too much for Nix, who is playing in his first true road game. I think that’ll be just enough for an Aggie victory. Gross. Texas A&M, -3.5

(P.S. Buy the half point if you can, just to avoid the half point bad beat on a field goal)

Ty:

LETTER TO SHAREHOLDERS

Finally, we took important steps throughout week three to refocus the entire TSI organization on our business principles, which begin and end with an absolute insistence on winning at all costs.

In particular, we have a major continuing initiative aimed toward ensuring that we exhibit unimpeachable alpha-like behavior in everything we do and reinforcing our culture of winning.

That culture, with its emphasis on winning, bragging, trash-talking and excellence, is our greatest strength, but it requires constant reinforcement, particularly in difficult weeks and under adverse conditions. Safeguarding our culture will continue to be one of our highest priorities in week four. 

RESTORING INVESTOR CONFIDENCE

The continuing after-effects of week two posed significant challenges to the sports outcomes financial markets and our fund. The huge losses associated with the Week 2 collapse severely affected investor confidence—which in turn was further shaken by the large and highly visible successes that emerged from Bobby and Blake. 

The more important point, at least for us at TSI, is that we understand and accept our responsibilities as one of the gatekeepers of the sports outcome financial markets. With the benefit of hindsight, it is clear that we all could have done better. We are committed to learning from our mistakes. Against this backdrop, in Week 3 there were dramatic changes in the legal and regulatory environment. The Weekend Spread proposed new corporate governance listing rules and the U.S. Congress passed the Quit F***ing Losing Act in an attempt to strengthen confidence in The Schooner Blog, The Captain’s Log and sports outcome financial markets. 

Even before the public controversy of Week 2 arose, we had taken a series of decisive steps commencing in Week 0 to protect further the integrity of our research and to improve its quality. During the weeks that followed, we worked closely with teams and other sports outcome investment funds in crafting the provisional settlement of Week 3.

In addition, we are supportive of a proposed industry initiative that generally would prohibit pirates from picking games, and we support it as an important step towards rebuilding investor confidence. 

We believe that only by putting appropriate corporate governance mechanisms in place and otherwise aligning the interests of management with shareholders, can there be sufficient focus on shareholder interests. In that connection, we refer you to our statements in The Schooner Pod for the Auburn-A&M game. Texas A&M, -3.5

Boatin’ Blake: I have been saying it since the beginning of the year but A&M is the most overrated team in college football. Sure, they have a good pass rush, but their offense is anemic. Watching them get clobbered by Clemson just shows how everything about this school is overrated. From tradition to their performance on the field, A&M is practically the Andrew Wiggins of college football. All bark no bite. Give me dem Tigers to kill the Aggies. Auburn, +3.5

#11 Michigan @ #13 Wisconsin (UW -3)

Bobby: While I don’t want to overreact to Michigan’s struggle against Army as I’ve seen in person what that triple option can do to a team, I’ve been out on the Wolverines since Day 1. Every year it’s the same old song and dance; Michigan is just good enough to send the hype through the roof and always seems to disappoint in the big games.

While I can’t shake the feeling that this one feels like a trap, I feel like Johnathan Taylor and that Wisconsin running game will be too much for Michigan. Add in the fact they are playing in the wasp-nest that is Camp Randall and I feel good enough to pick the Badgers. Wisconsin, -3

Ty: Friends, Investors, readers, lend me your ears; I come to bury Jim, not to praise him.

The championships that men win live after them; Their khakis are oft interred with their bones;

So let it be with Jim. The noble Urban Meyer Hath told you Jim was ambitious: If it were so, it was a grievous fault, And grievously hath Jim answer’d it. Here, under leave of Urban and the rest– For Urban is a National Champion; So are they all, all honorable men– Come I to speak in 

Jim’s funeral. He was my friend, faithful and just to me: But Urban says he was ambitious;

And Urban won the B1G. Jim hath brought zero trophies home to the Large Home, Whose ransoms did the general coffers fill: Did this in Jim seem ambitious? When that the UM fans have cried, 

Jim hath wept: Ambition should be made of sterner stuff: Yet Urban says he was ambitious;

And Urban always beat Jim. You all did see that in the contract I thrice asked him to cover,

Which he did thrice refuse: was this ambition? Yet Urban says he was ambitious; And, sure, he is an accomplished coach. I speak not to disprove what Urban spoke, But here I am to speak what I do know. You all did love him once, not without cause, Jim hath dabbed with Migos:

What cause withholds you then, to mourn for him? O judgment! thou art fled to brutish beasts,

And men have lost their reason. Bear with me; My heart is in the coffin there with Jim,

And I must pause till they cover. Wisconsin, -3

Boatin’ Blake: This is a do or die game for Jim Harbaugh this weekend. During his tenure at Michigan, he has failed to beat the Wolverine’s rivals time and time again and rarely shows up in big games.

Even with his history, I think Michigan wins outright in Madison. The Badgers have had a great showing so far, but their schedule has been MEH and they live and die by the run.

Harbaugh has had two weeks to prepare for this team and as long as he sells out for the run, then Wolverines should walk away easy from this one. (This pick is 100% me just praying that my Michigan CFP future remains intact). Michigan, +3.5

#7 Notre Dame @ #3 Georgia (UGA -13.5)

Bobby: This is a brutal line that really is asking you whether or not you think Notre Dame is any good. While the Fighting Irish were absolutely embarrassed in their College Football Playoff appearance against Clemson, let’s not forget the Tigers also demolished Alabama the very next week.

Plus, this Georgia team has lost plenty of talent from last season. While I know this UGA team is so flush with talent that they simply reload, I think there is just enough inexperience for Notre Dame to at least cover. I know this is a change from The Schooner Pod, but I think 13.5 is just too many points. Notre Dame, +13.5

Ty: Notre Dame is ass, and Rudy was a crappy made up movie. Georgia, -13.5

Boatin’ Blake: Death, taxes, and Notre Dame not being able to beat real opponents. That is all that needs to be said here. Lock of the week easy money special. Georgia, -13.5

SMU @ #25 TCU (TCU -9)

Bobby: After completely disrespecting TCU with a measly -3 closing line at Purdue, Vegas is back at it again with a WILD -9 line against SMU.

Look, I know SMU isn’t the collection of scrubs they once were. However, this TCU defense is a solid unit that can slow down this SMU offense that has looked good against bad competition.

If this was a random game, I could see the Frogs sleeping on SMU, but they’ll be going all out to defend the Iron Skillet. TCU, -9

Ty: Ahh yes, bitter crosstown Big 12 rivals SMU and TCU meet again, probably for like the 124th time or something.

SMU is not expected to be as good as TCU, I know this because there is no hashtag number next to their name. I believe that SMU is still barred from winning games by the NCAA for buying players corvettes and hookers, or something like that (shout out Hugh Freeze).

SMU is a party school; I know because I’ve partied there. TCU is not a party school, I know this because Blake went there. Blake the Lord of the Grubs (#insidejoke) is a pirate, not a party animal.

What does any of this have to do with this game you may ask? I have no idea, I’m writing this from Fuzzy’s and I’m two margs deep.

Anyways, the Frogs win because “more darts” and I will be betting on them to cover this lock of a line. TCU, -9

Boatin’ Blake: TCU still is rolling with the platoon of QBs, but it showed to be effective on the road against Purdue last week. TCU’s Defense is RAW again this year and shut down one of the best receivers in the nation last week to 3 catches for 25 yards.

On the other hand, SMU has been better this year but they have still yet to play a legitimate football team. I hate this rivalry so much because the Iron Skillet is going to stay in Fort Worth on Saturday just like it has for the past four centuries. Go Frogs. TCU, -9

West Virginia @ Kansas (WVU -5)

Bobby: I have absolutely no idea what to think of either team. I thought both Kansas and West Virginia were awful after losing to Coastal Carolina and getting blown off the field by Missouri respectively. So when both teams then immediately beat at worst mid-tier ACC teams, you can imagine my surprise.

I think this will be a pretty tight contest. If Kansas quarterback Carter Stanley performs like he did against Boston College, I think the Jayhawks have a real shot at this. KU’s loss came against a team that ran the ball well and chewed the clock. West Virginia might be one of the worst running teams in the country.

Another coin flip here. I’ll go with the team that is getting five points with the most momentum they’ve had since Mangino waddled into the sunset. Kansas, +5

Ty: I am contractually obliged to pick KU. Kansas, +5

Boatin’ Blake: Right now, everybody is on the gas and nobody is on the brakes when it comes to Kansas. Last week’s showing was more of how bad Boston College is and not how great Kansas is. People forget that they lost to COASTAL CAROLINA!!!!!!

I could find 11 middle schoolers and throw them up against this Kansas squad and put up at least a few TDs against them. Sorry Ty, but Kansas ain’t winning another game this year. West Virginia, -5

Oklahoma State @ #12 Texas (UT -5)

Bobby: I feel like it happens every year: Texas comes in hot, loses a game before Big 12 play, then screws up at least once before Red River, thus dampening the whole weekend. Face it, a two-loss, Playoff eliminated Texas doesn’t bring the same heat to the Cotton Bowl.

Don’t call me crazy, but I can’t shake the feeling they might slip up here.

Yeah, Oklahoma State looked flat after going up 14-0 on Tulsa, Texas will (should) be revenge hungry, and the lights and cameras will be on the Horns for this ABC primetime matchup.

But still. I can’t shake the feeling the Pokes at least make this a ballgame. Oklahoma State, +5

Ty: Oklahoma A&M is visiting Texas this weekend in another Battle of the Oranges. Side Note: Why do teams pick orange as a color? It is literally ass. Yes I’m looking at you too, Thunder.

Anyways, OU fans seem to know nothing about UT since we literally never play there, so lets refresh some memories here. First off ,their stadium is named after a Sooner, because obviously. Secondly, it won’t be some sort of crazy conspiracy that OSU’s band will be in the upper deck, they always do that. Ok, now everyone is caught up. 

Bobby and Blake may tell you some BS about OSU winning a lot in Austin, being Kryptonite or some other Avengers reference. We here at TSI are professionals, so we know that past performance is not indicative of future results, everyone should know that. The Pokes success at DKR in the past is in no way relevant to this game, the Longhorns will win. Texas will also cover this absolute lock of a spread at -5. Texas, -5

(Note: TSI will be taking a substantial $10.00 USD position in this game.)

Boatin’ Blake: The Captain is going on the road this week and will be attending this game on Saturday night. When I look at this line, I know why it is so low. Herman hasn’t beaten Gundy, since Herman was an assistant coach at Iowa State.

However, I think bettors are overrating this fact and this is an easy opportunity to cash a UT as favorites ticket. This Oklahoma State squad made me sweat out a game against a Tulsa team that had -78 rush yards against MSU. If OSU couldn’t stop the Golden Hurricane, no way they stop the Longhorns. Texas, -5

Weekend Spread: Week 3

Week 2 Standings

Bobby: 7-2 (13-7)

Ty: 1-8 (9-11)

Boatin’ Blake: 7-2 (15-5)

Tough week for Ty and the investors at TSI, as they went winless in standard predictions with the only win coming in the Army-Michigan lock. Bobby and Blake continue to tear it up from last season, going 7-2 and staying close atop the standings. Week 3 features much better matchups in the Big 12 and more challenges ahead.

(Editor’s Note: Blake’s Picks Will Be Coming Later Due To Pirate-Lawyer Stuff)

Stanford @ #17 UCF (UCF -7.5)

Bobby: Stanford is a picture of a team that is riding high off its own brand. To be fair, I believe this is the case with pretty much any good Pac 12 team.

The Cardinal are walking into a buzzsaw here. After two straight undefeated regular seasons that resulted in zero Playoff bids, UCF will be chomping at the bit to take on a Power 5 team in the regular season.

While I don’t think the Knights are as good as they’ve been in the past two years, The Bounce House will be absolutely rocking. UCF, -7

Ty: Stanford vs. UCF is a game that really parallels Oklahoma High School football so let’s jump into a comparison.

Stanford vs UCF is directly analogous to Casady School vs. Heritage Hall, one is a nationally recognized academic powerhouse (Casady/Stanford), the other is basically a for profit daycare for teens (UCF/Heritage).

Basically, Brains vs ‘Muh Sportz’, but not even sports good enough to hold up on the national/state scale. UCF is decent, but they aren’t beating ‘Bama or Clemson, and Heritage sure isn’t winning out against Tulsa Public teams.

Really this is an obvious pick. Heritage Hall UCF wins the game, but we all know who wins at life. Its not like UCF or Heritage have Alumni in The Bee Movie. 🤷‍♂️ UCF, -7

Boatin’ Blake: UCF, -7

#20 Washington State v. Houston (WAZZU -8.5)

Bobby: This is a Spider-Man meme game if I’ve ever seen it. Dana Holgorsen and Mike Leach have history together, similar personalities and practically the same offense. Both Houston and Washington State feature high powered offenses, bright red primary colors and are called Cougars. The two schools, despite being massively far away from each other, are intrinsically tied together. It’s a tough game to pick. However, there is one major difference here: D’Eriq King. While King was decent against OU a few weeks ago, I still think the guy is incredible. The Coogs keep it close with the Cougs and get the cover. Houston, +8.5

Ty: What a matchup of coaches! This should honestly be a recurring rivalry. The ‘Cougs of WSU vs. the UCF of Texas that isn’t TxSt. #TxStGangGangGang (Admittedly, I could have presented a better nickname for Houston but who cares, I hate them.)

Houston is of course, coached by none other than Dana “Rogaine” Holgorsen and because of that its time for a little Deutsche lesson.

Deutsche features many compound words, as many of us are aware. Compound words are able to better articulate in a word, a thought that requires an entire sentence in English. One such compound word is Backpfeifengesicht.

Backpfeifengesicht is a combination of Backpfeife meaning slap in the face, and Gesicht which roughly translates to outward appearance. Backpfeife and Gesicht together make Backpfeifengesicht which translates to a face that needs to be slapped, or a slappable face.

Old Rogaine is a perfect example of this. Das Washington State, -8.5

Boatin’ Blake: *Insert something about how Mike Leach is a fellow pirate* Washington State, -8.5

Texas Tech @ Arizona (Tech -2.5)

Bobby: Texas Tech is the king of narrow covers. They got a garbage-time backdoor touchdown in their first game against FCS South (writing this on the plane so that’s just gonna have to be their name) and got a half point cover against UTEP.

So why on Earth would I ever take Arizona and Kevin Sumlin, who have made a habit of constantly letting me down?

I wouldn’t and will not. Red Raiders by a field goal exactly. Texas Tech, -2.5

Ty: Bruh, Arizona is ass, Kevin Sumlin is ass and Texas Tech quarterback Alan Bowman hasn’t popped a lung yet. Texas Tech, -2.5

Boatin’ Blake: Texas Tech, -2.5

TCU @ Purdue (PUR -2)

Bobby: Our policy for the Weekend Spread is to grab the lines at opening. While the line has swung completely around to TCU’s side, my take on this game has not changed. TCU, quarterback issues and all, is going to absolutely POUND Purdue. If I was fast enough, I would have placed everything I own on dem Frogs, moneyline. TCU, +2

Ty: *Entire segment redacted by the FBI* TCU, +2

Boatin’ Blake: TCU, +2

Iowa @ Iowa State (IOWA -2)

Bobby: Biiiig shouts to our friends in Ames for getting their first College Gameday. As such, I believe Jack Trice Stadium will be absolutely raucous with farmer loaded up on Busch Light and chili. Is this a “let ‘er fly” pick? Of course. I still don’t care. Iowa State, +2

Ty: Iowa does the wave to the children’s hospital, while ISU is coached by Matt Campbell, who is just an off-brand, cowardly version of Bo Pelini. Iowa, -2

Boatin’ Blake: Iowa State, +2

Oklahoma State @ Tulsa (OSU -14)

Bobby: I was completely in on the Pokes earlier in this week before Boone Pickens passed. Now I’d consider it an absolute lock. OSU rolls big for Boone. This line never any sense in the first place. Oklahoma State, -14

Ty: This was going to be a segment on Tulsa’s annual beatdown by OSU and/or OU, but we have more important things to talk about.

On September 11th, 2019, T. Boone Pickens passed away. T. Boone was an alum of OSU, and a lifelong fan. OSU owes nearly everything they have today to T. Boone.

T. Boone is a classic American corporate raider. In the 1980s he was a pirate to energy companies, first with his energy company Mesa Petroleum and later his hedge fund BP Capital (Boone Pickens Capital, not British Petroleum). He developed celebrity status, not unlike many other prominent corporate raiders, such as Michael Milken, the fictional Gordon Gekko, and to a lesser extent, OU’s Michael F. Price.

He even graced the cover of Time Magazine in March of ’85, which was a huge deal in the age of print magazines.

T. Boone remained a raider through the 80s and 90s, before founding BP Capital in 1997. Through BPC’s two subsidiary funds, T. Boone made substantial gains through energy investments.

BPC was known to have large positions in Halliburton, ExxonMobil, and other major energy names. In 2006, T.Boone earned $990 million from BPC and earned $2.7 BILLION in 2007 as BPC grew 24% in just one year.

As he stepped back from his raiding days, T. Boone remained in the public eye by becoming an active and outspoken donor to politics, universities, and various other humanitarian causes. It is estimated that T. Boone gave over a billion dollars to charity, with over $500 million going to Oklahoma State.

Most notably, T. Boone gave Mike Gundy $30 to get a haircut in his will.

This game against instate rival Tulsa will be the first time that OSU takes the field without T. Boone flying in on his G550 to cheer them on. The Pokes will be playing in his honor and wearing helmet stickers all season long to commemorate him.

Oklahoma State has a potent offense, and in T.Boone’s honor they are going to thump Tulsa. I would bet OSU by 90 if I could. Oklahoma State, -14

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma State, +14

North Carolina State @ West Virginia (NCST -7)

Bobby: West Virginia STINKS. While I was on the fence a bit last week about whether or not that James Madison game was just a tough early challenge or proof that the Mountaineers were going to be bad, Missouri confirmed my suspension.

I don’t know if NC State is any good, but I know they are at least seven points better than this dumpster fire. North Carolina State, -7

Ty: MY NC State Wolfpack travels up country roads to the land of fat and sadness. This pick is purely personal to me, as WVU has screwed me for the last time. NC State (really cool campus btw) takes the W in Morgantown and covers easy. North Carolina State, -7

Boatin’ Blake: North Carolina State, -7

Kansas State @ Mississippi State (MSU -8.5)

Bobby: I can’t believe I’m saying this and I know it’ll probably probably doom this team, but I’m a believer in this Kansas State team. Skylar Thompson has been incredibly sharp, leading the country in QBR so far.

We will see if the ‘Cats can keep it up or not, mainly because both teams they’ve faced were awful, but I like them to cover against a not very good Mississippi State team. Don’t be shocked if they pull off the W in Starkville. Kansas State, +8.5

Ty: The wily cats travel to Starkvegas to take on the cowbell ringin’ Bulldogs. Starkville isn’t a particularly difficult place to play, but Mississippi State isn’t exactly a pushover either. KSU has been promising, but I don’t think that they will pull out a W against an SEC West team (sorry not sorry, but KSU ain’t s***). MS. St. by at least ten. Mississippi State, -8.5

Boatin’ Blake: Mississippi State, -8.5

#5 Oklahoma @ UCLA (OU -22.5)

Bobby: The early line of OU -17 might have been one of the biggest misfires I’ve ever seen. UCLA isn’t just bad, they might be one of the worst Power 5 teams in the country.

While the extra 5.5 does make me pause for a second, I think the Sooners are too good, too focused and too willing to stomp out a major brand on national TV. Oklahoma, -22.5

Ty: OU travels to sunny Los Santos to take on the UC-L-L-A Bruins (wtf is a bruin?). UCLLA is a proud university, with a rich football tradition. OU scheduled UCLLA thinking that they would be a huge top 10 marquee matchup, that has not come to fruition. OU easily takes the W and covers a measly 22.5 point spread. Oklahoma, -22.5

Boatin’ Blake: Oklahoma, -22.5

Weekend Spread: Week 2

Week 1 Standings

Bobby: 6-3 (6-5)

Ty: 7-2 (8-3)

Boatin’ Blake: 6-3 (8-3)

Week 1 saw great success for all three pickers, with Ty taking the narrow one game edge over Bobby and Blake, despite missing on his Wildcard pick. Ty and Blake sit atop the leaderboard, with Bobby only two games behind. With two big matchups (and a lot of crappy Big 12 games), who will pull ahead?

The Wildcard

Bobby: Oregon State @ Hawaii (Hawaii -6.5)

This game is the perfect combination of the takes I got the most right (Oregon State being poo poo) and the most wrong (Hawaii on island being overrated) so far this season.

Oregon State is big time screwed here. Arizona, a slightly better team, did abysmal on island. After seeing what Oklahoma State did to them in Corvalis last Thursday, the Beavers have no chance on island. Rainbow Warriors, BIG. Hawaii, -6.5

Ty: Army @ #7 Michigan (UM -23)

Choo, choo here comes the easy money train! ARE YOU KIDDING ME MICHIGAN BY 23?!? Army is coming to town with the triple option train, and I’m putting the Wolverines on upset alert. That isn’t that probable, but UM certainly isn’t going to win by 23. Army, +23

Boatin’ Blake: Wake Forest @ Rice (WF -18)

(Editor’s Note: Just go to 13:35 of The Captain’s Log)

#12 Texas A&M @ #1 Clemson (CLEM -17.5)

Bobby: You’re really daring me to take Texas A&M here, aren’t you Vegas? I have a lot of confidence in Clemson to get a solid win here, but 17.5 just seems like a bit much here.

This game won’t be nearly as close as last year’s thriller, but it won’t be a great one either. The Aggies will hang around juuuuust long enough to get a narrow cover, which will probably result in them hanging a banner at the facility in excitement. Texas A&M, +17.5

Ty: Valued intelligent sports outcome investors, let me first congratulate you for choosing to put your hard-earned cash with TSI. As everyone is aware TSI blew away Bobby and Blake in the first week of sports outcome investment.

This week TSI remains cautiously optimistic for future returns. This second week of the CFB season will be a turbulent one. Last week we saw that in the storm you want Ty driving the ship, not that silly pirate boy. Where do we need to sail the ship this week? TOWARDS THE F****** RETURNS, this is what the other two commentators don’t understand.

This first game is the game that hands down should have gotten College Game Day, that’s right it’s A&M (losers) at Clemson (Scoobs in orange). The line here is ridiculously low, A&M would have 5 losses if they simply played within the state of Texas, does anyone think that they will beat Clemson?

Travis Etienne the humble hero will put up legendary numbers, and Trevor “Sarah Jessica Parker” Lawrence will snap and put up numbers fitting for the #1 team’s starting QB. Clemson EASILY takes the W here and a Clem -17.5 line IS A JOKE! Ha ha ha very funny, but seriously this is free money, throw the mortgage on Clemson here, then take out a loan using your organs as collateral and put that on Clemson too. Clemson, -17.5

Boatin’ Blake: Ugh this is the week I have to join the Axis of Evil and root for two of my least favorite programs of all time. I love money and glory more than my hate for A&M, so I am rolling with the Aggies on this one.

Jimbo Fisher is very familiar with Dabo from his FSU days and people forget how close last years game was in College Station. I live in Aggie Country and I don’t know if I am mentally strong enough to hear how good this A&M team is if they win, but I am tired of Clemson making the playoff. Aggies get the cover. Texas A&M, +17.5

#6 LSU @ #9 Texas (LSU -5.5)

Bobby: Another game I absolutely hate. This is a tough one because I don’t quite trust either of these teams at all.

Much of the debate this week on Sooner Twitter has been whether or not we should root for Texas. Personally, I think there are a few scenarios where it’s okay to silently, mildly, pull for the Horns.

  • It directly benefits OU. Not “oh the Big 12 looks good with a win here) benefits, but rather “this advances OU in the Big 12 race and eliminates someone ahead of them”.
  • You picked them to win in an online blog or exchanged money in the hopes of winning more money.
  • You lowkey want a big time, high stakes, Red River game. This is the most dubious of reasons, but still one I hold sympathy though.

And that’s the list. Also, if Texas loses, you cannot be upset as Texas losing is always pretty funny.

Anyways, this game is about as even as it gets in my mind. Both are frauds, but the Longhorns playing at night against a big non-conference foe is something that is hard to pick against. I don’t trust LSU enough to give up any points. Texas, +5.5

Ty: College Gameday is in Austin this week for UT v. LSU and we here at TSI are beyond overjoyed to see longtime friend of good vibes Matthew McConaughey will be on set. When my analysts and interns applied the SMPG to this game we came up with a clear winner.

Texas is a clear lock here, we here at TSI recommend taking a large position in this game, per our analysis Texas is a clear lock here for the win, so a LSU -5.5 line makes this an even safer investment. LSU is a tremendous team, and a real threat to anyone, but so is Texas.

A healthy “Trill Sammy” should help the Longhorns pick apart LSU’s D, and UT is apparently “DBU” LOL so they better not allow a single passing TD. Texas takes the W and covers, but deep down I just want LSU’s band to play “Neck”. Texas, +5.5

Boatin’ Blake: Let’s just rip the band aid off and get to my second “Axis of Evil” pick. This is a straight numbers pick for me. As a head coach, Tom Herman has gone 12-3-1 ATS the spread as an underdog. You are a fool to bet against this trend….. AN ABSOLUTE FOOL!!!!!! Also, everybody is on the LSU hype train while nobody is on the brakes.

Joe Burrough (or however you spell his name) is being treated like Johnny Manziel or Tim Tebow, but in reality he is more like a Brandon Allen or Blake Sims. Take the UT money line and spread here and reap the profits. Texas, +5.5

UTEP @ Texas Tech (Tech -34.5)

Bobby: Texas Tech showed some promise in their Week 1 rout over Montana State, so much so that they ran up the score on the poor Bobcats with a last second touchdown from Alan Bowman who probably shouldn’t have been in the game in the first place. This score soiled my cover.

I’m not sure if I should pick against Tech out of spite, or learn from my mistakes and pick them against a truly awful UTEP team that had to hold on to dear life against Houston Baptist?

I’m going to be measured here and pick Texas Tech, mainly because I would definitely get screwed with this line. Texas Tech, -34.5

Ty: Valued investors, while I will never mislead you, TSI has not been able to determine a definitive analysis for this game. We here at TSI have tried a variety of proprietary and public analysis strategies and tools to determine a cover, and we are not able to say with any degree of confidence who it will be.

TSI’s official recommendation is to avoid this game as it is a very toxic investment that has a low potential for returns and a high potential for losses. Texas Tech does have a fairly well regarded QB, but they are still unproven without the perfectly 50/50 Kliff Kingsbury.

TSI does not believe that Texas Tech has enough to get up 35, even on UTEP, but UTEP is absolutely TERRIBLE. Herein lies the question, do we really count on post Leach TTU? No, no we don’t. UTEP, +34.5

Boatin’ Blake: The above was my reaction to see this game on the slate. God, I am ready for conference play because the fact that I am spending my valuable time evaluating this game is insanity. You know what, I am rolling the dice on this one and going with the Miners. UTEP, +34.5

Coastal Carolina @ Kansas (KU -9.5)

Bobby: Kansas did in fact get a win last week, but it was far from an encouraging performance against Indiana State. Coastal Carolina isn’t a great team, but they are better than the trash that Indiana State is. If the line was KU -7, I’d probably call it a push, but give me the Chanticleers in a close cover. Coastal Carolina, +9.5

Ty: Valued investors, the only three things to count on in this life are death, taxes, and Kansas winning four or more games of football this year. KU already has the first dub of the season, and their win streak will continue here. Expect KU to be a decent investment in this game due to the low line and a tremendous investment in the future as an underdog. Kansas, -9.5

Boatin’ Blake: For the first time since I was a young tot, Kansas could possibly go on a two game win streak (Editor’s Note: Extremely Dennis Reynolds voice: Two Games?). Kansas struggled heavily vs an FCS opponent last week and I don’t think this week will be any better.

The Les Miles effect will take at least 4 years to have any effect and Kansas will remain the whipping boy of the Big 12 for the time being. Coastal Carolina is also a very Boatin’ Blake style of team so give me the Chanticleers. Coastal Carolina, +9.5

West Virginia @ Missouri (Mizzou -14)

Bobby: Both of these teams looked atrocious Week 1. West Virginia narrowly escaped with a win against FCS James Madison and Missouri flat out lost to Wyoming.

Ty: TSI investors let me just tell you, this one is personal. I HATE Mizzou, I hate their colors, I hate their vibes, I hate their mascot, I hate their school, and most of all I hate their dumb ass abbreviation or whatever, like what is a Mizzou? As part of game related research TSI used something called “the internet” to look up what a Mizzou is.

The “Internet” is kind of like a library or something, anyways on the “internet” my analysts found something called “Urban Dictionary”. Urban Meyer is a very successful coach, so we went to his dictionary for answers.

When we searched Mizzou in Urban’s dictionary we found several answers. Then we remembered that Baker Mayfield never played Mizzou, Baker Mayfield also wore number 6. 6, Mizzou was once ranked 6th, this led us to the number 6 definition in Urban’s Dictionary. 

Mizzou (meh-zu) noun

A slang term for failure.

Examples:

  1. I couldn’t get into DeVry so I went to Mizzou.
  2. Mizzou didn’t even make the NIT
  3. I cant spell Missouri, so ill just write Mizzu
  4. I go to Mizzou, I am impotent.
  5. My mom is my sister, I must go to Mizzou.

#failure #embarrassment #impotency #syphilis #incest

We can clearly tell from Urban Meyer’s own definition that Mizzou is NOT the move here. WVU looked terrible last week, but they didn’t let us down, its time to buckle up and take a ride down the country roads. This pick is made easier by the ridiculous Mizzou line, WVU gets the cover. West Virginia, +14

Boatin’ Blake: Everybody was all over Kelly Bryant this summer and was drooling over him. I really did not understand the hype because while he was at Clemson, I called him the Storm Trooper because he had about the same success rate at hitting his target.

However, this West Virginia teams is BAD this year and I think Mizzou does not want to be embarrassed two weeks in a row; give me the Tigas. Missouri, -14

Bowling Green @ Kansas State (KSU -23)

Bobby: Last season, Jamison employed a strategy where he would repeatedly bet against Kansas State until they eventually failed to cover. It took him until Week 9 to properly pick a Kansas State line.

Needless to say, even though Bill Snyder is no longer head coach, his teams seem to be equally as slippery to pick. I feel like I’m doomed either way here, so give me Kansas State to cover. Kansas State, -23

Ty: KSU vs. a school for bowling? I’m assuming that Bowling Green is not a reference to going to a bowl game. Also, is green a reference to money? Are they literally telling us to pick them for cash?

Hard to tell if you ask me. TSI incorrectly picked the KSU game last week, so let’s just take a shot in the dark here. Again TSI recommends that you not take any meaningful position in this game, but if you do Bowling Green its in the name. Bowling Green, +23

Boatin’ Blake: Last week, I saw K-State play inspired in memory of their late coach Bill Snyder. This is a team of destiny that is playing in his loving memory. Wildcats by a billion. Kansas State, -23

UTSA @ Baylor (BU -27.5)

Bobby: Ugh, this week sucks. I think the Bears have a four touchdown cover in them though. Baylor, -27.5

Ty: Baylor is ass. UTSA, +27.5

Boatin’ Blake: I am calling this game Fort Knox because I cannot put enough locks on this game. Baylor is going to truck this team and put the 50 burger on them.

Vegas messed up by giving a line so low to a team that is considered by many the dark horse of the Big 12. I am not as high on Charlie Brewer, but this UTSA team isn’t in the same league as the Bears. Sailor Bear for the win. Baylor, -27.5

South Dakota @ #4 Oklahoma (OU -36.5)

Bobby: There are many FCS teams that can sneak up on a good D1 team. South Dakota is not one of them.

This defense will be scared out of their mind of embarrassing Alex Grinch, therefore I see an all around effort to keep the Coyotes at or under a field goal. The first team offense will do their thing and the backups will try to make the most of this opportunity to play significant time on Owen Field. Sooners with a comfortable cover, providing us plenty of time to watch the fourth quarter of the Axis of Evil Bowl in Austin. Oklahoma, -36.5

Ty: As is TSI’s recommendation for all OU games please read The Schooner Blog’s in-depth analysis and listen to The Schooner Pod. The line here is ridiculously high, and TSI does not believe that it will be met.

My opinion on OU games is that if I pick OU not to cover I will either be correct, or presently surprised. I believe that OU can get the cover, but I don’t believe that OU will continue to run up the score past 21 or 28. South Dakota, +36.5

Boatin’ Blake: I would default to the Schooner Blog boyz on the analysis for this game because I honestly know nothing about this South Dakota team. OU’s defense is bad, but there is no way South Dakota takes advantage of it. Can’t wait to watch OU cover on some guys Twitch stream. Oklahoma, -36.5